A True Sports Fan's Top 5 Pet Peeves

I've decided to compile a list of the top 5 things real sports fans absolutely detest. If you are an angry person like me(this is my first piece for LMM, you will quickly learn all I do is Hate), those band-waggon Dallas Cowboy and Yankee loving imposters from around the continent make a non violent catholic tennis player, like myself, want to go all Tonya Harding and take out their kneecaps with a baseball bat. We can all agree that there is nothing worse than a fan who just doesn't know their facts(I don't claim to know everything about every sports team, that's why I could care less about baseball and hockey, nor do I have a "team" in either league) but lets break it down a little further...

5. Casual fan going against your team, just because.... How many times have you been watching a game on TV at a bar or at a buddies house with your team(I'm talking @ericsalslmm style when a J - E - T - S game is on) playing and the people you are with don't really have an opinion for either team? More often than not, that asshole friend of yours will root against your team just to get the satisfaction of pissing you off. Hey needle dick, I don't hate on that Div 3 college baseball team of yours when they square off against Chapman in the first of 6 meetings this season, just because its on TV and Fox Sports West decided to show the game for the 18 people watching. Taking it a step further, it is even worse when a girl thinks shes being all cute rooting against the team you shed blood and tears for, week in and week out. Hey slampiece, this isn't cute.. if you pull this nonsense with me during a Chargers/Colts game you will be dropped like Ryan Grant Week 1.

4. Wearing the Jersey of an Ex-Player/A team that isn't even playing... It really bothers me when I go to a game for my favorite team(not the Patriots) and I see people wearing the jersey of a ex-player who now is a linebacker on the Patriots. Guess what, your Jersey is dated. You paid at least $140 for your ticket to this one game, I know you can afford a new jersey of a player we currently have on our team. Now I know people will say, Davis, what about a throwback.. Hey that's fine, wear your Niners Steve Young jersey all you want, he retired with the Niners so he isn't an Ex-Player. I'm talking Tiberwolve fans wearing Garnett jerseys.. WHY? Sack up and get the fresh beach boy royalty jersey with a #42 on the back of that Twolves jersey.

On another note, nothing is a bigger dead giveaway to show you are a fake fan than wearing a jersey to a game between two teams, and the jersey you are wearing isn't even of one of the teams playing. I was at a Suns/Blazers game recently and there was a guy sitting in some pretty nice seats wearing a Mav's white to the game.. Dude, the girl you brought and spent $300/ticket on for those seats doesn't know the Mavs aren't playing, and since hey its a basketball jersey at an NBA game, it makes you look like a true fan to her. To me sitting 8 rows behind you, you look like a tool.

3. Cheering for a player by the wrong name... Now I understand some sports are more difficult than others to identify a player. In football, there are helmets and in baseball there are hats. However, there is no excuse for a person watching the Panthers to scream "Do IT Deangelo!" each time Catholic saint Jimmy Clausen hands the ball off to one of the 4 RBs that have carried the ball this year. Hey Willy Weekender, learn which player is which, if not by his style of running or the down/yardage scenario, but at least by the NUMBER and NAME on the back of his jersey. This may be a bad example as I doubt anyone has heard someone get excited about a Panthers run since 2 years ago in that 12-4 miracle season they put together.

2. Missing a Game... There is no excuse to miss a game with technology these days. Sure some seasons are longer than others(baseball). If you are a Phil Mickelson fan, then Thursday - Sunday(although Lefty will miss a few cuts so take Sat. and Sun. off sometimes) of the golf season should be dedicated to following your favorite. There are too many ways to watch a game or sporting event these days, that no matter what your excuse is, I will probably call you a fake fan if you miss it. All major sports now have a channel or a package dedicated to coverage. Be it NFL Sunday Ticket, Center Ice, the Golf Channel, or the Internet: no matter where you are you should be able to watch any team or player. Real fans budget in that extra $279 for Sunday Ticket, and if they don't you better believe they are at a bar that has it every Sunday.

If you are at work, church, or a rub n' tug; it shouldn't matter. Watch it on your mobile device or bring a laptop with you. Listen to it on the radio(yes they still have those things), worst case scenario, DVR or TIVO it and turn off all contact/avoid any human interaction with the world until you have been able to watch the game. There is no excuse to miss a game if you are a true fan. I have a buddy that claims to be a Jets fan and I was astonished when he "slept" through one of their 10 am games. ASTONISHED. To make it worse, he wasn't even bedding a Dame. The guy was just too hung over to wake up, then has the nerve to boast about the win which he saw recapped in 2 plays on Boomer's Fastest 3 Minutes.

1. A Lockout... This is devastating and the timing couldn't be more appropriate to address the topic. With rumors circulating about lockouts in several sports over the next few seasons, we the fans are scratching our heads in disbelief. Players, Owners, and the Leagues need to realize that none of them would have jobs or the amazing piles of cash they do without the fans. We buy the tickets, we buy the merchandise, we buy the TV packages and it isn't with straight cash homie. No one in the industry(no I don't mean the nightlife scene for any of you promoters or barbacks who may be reading this and get boners thinking you are in the "industry", I'll table this side topic for another article) of sports would have an existence without the fans. I understand very well each side of the argument, especially with revenue sharing, which is causing the stress for next years NFL season.

When it comes down to it, even if an agreement is reached prior to the cancellation of any games, the league will most likely incur a debt of over $1 billion (Click Here for a good quick read). Guess where that money will be made back? Tickets and Merchandise. Me, the true fan who shells out the cash for Sunday Ticket, the newest jerseys, and the obligatory team mugs(set of 10 for anyone that wants to party) won't be able to afford those season tickets anymore. Shame on the league, the players union, and ownership for not realizing this. Real fans won't stand for this and the leagues should be very careful before they attempt to alienate their cash cows. Maybe Godell is banking on fans like the Mavs guy I referenced in Pet Peeve #4 who is there trying to get laid. Give me a season without price increases and guaranteed football; I'll get laid with four lokos and my A game on my own time.